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AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

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Topic by Bob posted 337 days ago 296 views 0 times favorited 10 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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Bob

1427 posts in 862 days
hardiness zone 3b

337 days ago

Topic tags/keywords: humor

Something everybody can use

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers, simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
Remember to use a timer.

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you’ll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life – WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn’t move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn’t move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them….

If you can’t fix it with a hammer, you’ve got an electrical problem.

-- I want to believe in a lot of things but, in the meantime I have to deal with the truth

View mario1360's profile

mario1360

921 posts in 529 days
hardiness zone 5a

337 days ago

love this one : If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you’ll be afraid to cough.lol…lol…lol

-- south shore montreal, zone 5a, whish it was 9

View MsDebbieP's profile

MsDebbieP

7956 posts in 1114 days
hardiness zone 5b

337 days ago

perfect!

-- - Debbie, SW Ontario Canada (USDA Hardiness Zone: 5a) http://www.execulink.com/~yohan

View Robin's profile

Robin

2146 posts in 377 days
hardiness zone 5b

337 days ago

Thanks for the laughs, Bob. A nice way to relax after a very busy day.

-- Robin, Massachusetts - "Live simply so others can simply live." M. Gandhi

View jroot's profile

jroot

3123 posts in 744 days
hardiness zone 5a

337 days ago

speaking of mouse traps …. has anyone else noted that the mice are coming inside a LOT EARLIER than usual?

We have caught 5 so far in the last week. ... going for the compost pail under the sink. I have never had them inside during the summer before, and I have had a compost pail under the sink for many years … emptied every day or so on a regular basis.

A peanut on the trap works wonders.

The raccoons have figured out how to open my compost bin outside. They get on top and rock and twist at the same time, twisting the top about 20 degrees until it comes loose. Smart little critters aren’t they?

-- jroot

View Bon's profile

Bon

4999 posts in 894 days
hardiness zone 5a

336 days ago

(LOL) loved the jokes Bob.
Jroot when I had my cottage I used to use crazy glue and glue seeds or peanuts on my mice traps.It works great.It made it a lot harder for them to steal the bait and get away.

-- Bon,Hastings,Ont.....zone 5a....Always room for one more

View Bob's profile

Bob

1427 posts in 862 days
hardiness zone 3b

336 days ago

Bon, remember that the early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese! <g>

-- I want to believe in a lot of things but, in the meantime I have to deal with the truth

View MIKE CRIPPS's profile

MIKE CRIPPS

402 posts in 889 days

336 days ago

WELL BOB ITS NICE TO SEE YOU HAVE STILL GOT YOUR SENSE OF HUMOUR, HOW ARE YOUR GARDEN GNOMES DOING HAVE YOU PAINTED THEM UP FOR THE WINTER ? I WAS OFFERED A FREE TICKET TO A CONCERT BY A LOCAL WELL KNOWN HARPIST BUT I DECLINED NOT WISHING TO HEAR THE CELLESTIAL BANJO JUST YET . REGARDS MIKE

-- MIKE MILTON COMMON U.K.

View Bob's profile

Bob

1427 posts in 862 days
hardiness zone 3b

335 days ago

Hi Mike:
Good to see you are hangin in there .
I fellow should stay away from those dress rehearsals for the big sleep at all times.
The Gnomes have left home and joined the crusade for pesticide bans.
They were organizing a big protest march in Ontario but one got ill and the other one didn’t want to march alone.

-- I want to believe in a lot of things but, in the meantime I have to deal with the truth

View sharad's profile (online now)

sharad

547 posts in 331 days
hardiness zone 11

318 days ago

Bob, your simple home remedies are marvelous. I hope there are no side effects. I will pass on these to my friends.
Sharad

-- Bagwan-- “If someone feels that they had never made a mistake in their life, then it means they have never tried a new thing in their life”.-Albert Einstein

View Bob's profile

Bob

1427 posts in 862 days
hardiness zone 3b

318 days ago

I hope Kamlavati reads these. He seems to have a few of his own that make me smile. ;-)

Bob

-- I want to believe in a lot of things but, in the meantime I have to deal with the truth

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